Finally, you are at the point of letting go of someone from your life, or you are at the doubt how to let someone into your life. So welcome to the hard reality. Letting go of people is scary because that person might be your best friend, your lover, your partner or someone close to you. It doesn’t matter how that person close to you. If that person does not bring value to your life or if that person harms your mental health or physical health, it’s good to let him/her go. In this article, we are going to learn to abut letting go of toxic people from your life.
What is a toxic personality?
Toxic people are more pessimist and negative. They are uninspiring, discouraged and stubborn. This does not mean that a toxic person is a bad one. Someone can be good for us while being a toxic person to another person. It depends on how that person affects your life. As an example, a toxic person can stop you from being successful. They never apologies fr the thing that they are doing. It is a myth which says that a toxic person is always rude, heartless and cold. When it comes to nowadays, most toxic people can be found withing strong relationship. They smile, they help, they talk well. But they are doing everything to drain our energy.
The most seen characteristic of a toxic person is controlling. They always try to control our behaviours and feelings. They try to frame us and make us stop thinking beyond the box. Toxic people comes in many faces. Sometimes they openly blame us, and sometimes they become our best friends, someone they don’t contact us directly. But they use someone or hide and seek tricks to drain our energy or control our lives.
Types of toxic people
In psychology, toxic people are divided into many categories. Some toxic people control our life intentionally while some are controlling our life unintentionally. But we have to make sure that both situations are bad for us. Before letting go of people, we have to identify them with the exact type.
They always try to break our mental health by discouraging us. Energy drainers always say that “you can’t do this”, “It’s not suitable”, “You are fat/thin” etc. They drain our energy by breaking our mental health.
We all have experience in this type of toxic people. Most people don’t think how to let someone into your life. Because of that, they make a relationship with toxic people quickly. Backstabbers are acting like our friends, lovers, closer people etc. But when something happened on behalf of their favour, they leave us. They use our secrets, weaknesses to hit us back. They stab us from our back, and that’s why they are called backstabbers.
It’s essential to learn how to let go of someone who always tries to control and manipulate your behaviours and feelings. They always say “don’t do that” whether it is a good thing or bad thing. They always expect us to be their puppets.
These people are more dangerous. But when you identified them, it is easy to live. They say lovely, friendly things to our face when we are at in front of them. But when we are not near to them, they do everything to break our reputation. When you identified the exact spiritual vampires, it is easy to control their impact on our life.
It is critical to let go of toxic people who are fake compliments. They always praise our behaviours and thoughts. But it’s fake. They only praise our work to make us help them. They only search for us when they need a favour. When they don’t need help anymore, they leave you.
Letting go of toxic people who can break your family is essential. They do everything to break our relationships by creating doubts about your partner, lover, family members. Also, they use the weaknesses of our relations to break the family.
They are the ones who are jealous of us. They do everything to break our growth. JJs always expect us to follow them and be behind them. They gets jealous and angry when we surpass them and become successful.
This is another common type of toxic people. They change after getting what they want from us. So it is essential to learn how to let go of people who have changed. They use as a tool, and they abandon the tool after using it.
Reasons for letting go of toxic people
In this paragraph, we are going to learn the reasons for letting go of toxic people. Suppose you are in doubt of how to let someone Into your life, just match these reasons with their past behaviours. Suppose you are going to marry someone, evaluate the possibility of them to become a good husband or good wife.
Loss of trust
It is easy to break the trust, but it is hard to build trust. Once someone broke the trust, there is no certainty that they will no break it again. So it is your responsibility to decide. Trust is a critical factor for any relationship because trust becomes the base to share the deepest secrets. So if someone breaks your trust once, there is no point of believing that person again.
Relationships should motivate us for good. If they are not, there is no point in having that kind of relationships. All of us need backup when becoming a successful person. Getting a backup does not mean that without help, we cannot achieve anything. Backup means motivation. Even a word can inspire us. If you cannot find that motivation in your relationship, you have to decide.
When it hurts
If a relationship can hurt you mentally or physically, it is a red flag which shows that you are in a toxic relationship. If your happiness fadeaways when a person comes near to you, it is a toxic relationship. So learn how to let someone go who hurts your feelings or hurt you.
When things changed
Everything is constantly changing. It is appliable for anything in this world. But when something changed into an unfavourable situation, you must leave it. Suppose your lover was very kind and romantic a few years ago. But he is rude and unpleasant now. So it is a reason to let that toxic relationship go unless you can change him.
If your friend, partner, a lover tries to encourage you for the wrongful things, it is a toxic relationship. It clearly says that he/she is not a good friend, partner, lover to have a relationship with. Toxic people try to grab you to do the bad things, but finally, you may be the one who ends up with bad experiences.
How to let go of toxic people?
In this paragraph, we are going to discuss the steps to letting go of toxic people.
The first step of letting go of people is identifying what they are mean to you. Above paragraphs shows the types of toxic people and the red flags of identifying them. Use these criteria carefully before letting go of people. Otherwise, you will end up losing some good relationships.
Set emotional boundaries
Toxic people can only hurt you when you have open emotional boundaries. If you can limit how people can affect your life, you can easily live with them. This is all about having a positive attitude about yourself. If you are mentally strong, no toxic person can hurt you can drain your energy.
Don’t blame yourself.
People have different paths. There is no need for having the same path as your friend.partner or lover. So don’t blame yourself for what is happening in your relationship. People with different path end up with arguments, disagreements. It’s a common situation, and you are not entirely responsible for that.
Not everyone is toxic. You may have some good people around you who truly help you. If you end up with a toxic relationship and you are mentally broke, just get help from others. There is no need for suffering alone. You can share your pain. If you don’t have someone to share, you can seek the help of professionals.
Cut off contacts
Researchers explain that you should have guts to cut off contact and letting go of toxic people. Only keep the contacts which can make your life easy. It means just keep the contacts of good people. Don’t use social media to inspect what toxic people do and don’t ask from others about them. When you don’t see toxic people, and when you don’t hear about them, you will be free again.
Invest in yourself
Investing in yourself is an excellent way to letting go of people. Just surround yourself with goals, objectives and strategies to achieve them. When you are in the right focus, no one can disturb you. Always practice self-care, self-love. This will help to let go of toxic people. If you have no idea about what to do next read this.
Know when to forgive
Not everyone deserves forgiveness. Some people do wrong things to you unintentionally and have an intention to make it right. Those are the people who deserve forgiveness. Others, who do not make apologies and who do not understand the mistakes and keep doing wrong to you, don’t deserve forgiveness. So make sure you forgive the right person.
Focus on healthy relationships
Not every relationship is toxic. There are so many people who can make a healthy relationship with you. When you find them, grow with them and be with them to forget your toxic experience. Also loving the right person can help you to put the pain away. So always focus on better relationships.
Manage your time
Make yourself busy. It does not mean you should be stuck in a busy schedule. Use your time to do your regular works and things you love. Read a book, play a game, do anything that makes you happy and busy. Be a good time manager and manage the day in the way you can forget the toxic person.
Yes, It is hard to let someone go from your life. So all steps are about making your mind ready to live without that person. Letting go of people always requires confidence. Otherwise, you will find yourself in the middle of troubles. So be a confident person who can remove unnecessary people from your life. Most importantly learn how to let someone into your life. If you chose the right person at the beginning, there would be no issued in the future. Be a good person to others.